Wednesday, March 14, 2007

From 2004

When Geister was the same date as the e-mail.

This is an excerpt from an e-mail I wrote in May 2004, when my son was four months old. It contained questions regarding what I had learned about myself since becoming a mother.
The first section must have been my general thoughts (??). Who can remember. You can see my editorial comments are italicized.

I have no guilt about leaving my baby in dirty diapers, when I can't be bothered to change him. No comment.
At some point, sleep deprivation will catch up with me. Huh! As if four months of spotty sleep was deprivation!
I may be vain—Geister's flat head really bothers me. It’s all good now.

2) What have you learned about God since becoming a mother?
How much he must love us!!! And, how easily we could please him with the simplest things. This part I meant.
Re: Psalm 131—heavily quoted by Elizabeth George in A Woman After God's Own Heart. We were all meant to be homemakers!!! I believe I am saying this in jest, but Elizabeth George isn’t.

3) Do you feel like you've given up your own life since becoming a mother?
Yes!!! I don't do much for myself anymore. When Geister was 4 weeks old, my mom and him and I went to the mall and I splurged on some makeup—I remember it as being SO indulgent to buy something for myself, and to think of myself.
I have definitely given up work (temporarily anyway). However, I am rediscovering parts of my life—I'm reading more, participating in the community more.

4) What haven't you done since the baby was born?
Movies (at night). Restaurants (at night). Gotten a decent haircut. Travelled lightly. Eaten slowly.

5) How many times did you get up last night?
Once!!!! :)

6) What has the baby done to surprise you this week?
See above response :) He has also gnawed at my fingers, and he has sat in his high chair with great enjoyment watching my husband and I eat.

7) What do you do when you feel overwhelmed?
Internalize. Then talk to my husband when I can. Also, call the Grandmas in to help.
I’m not sure what talking to my husband would do, aside from increase the stress due to his sympathetic but entirely too practical suggestions ("You just need more sleep"; "Hire a babysitter" and the like); Now my first line of defense is to call K, A, R, G, AS, among others ;)

8) Which of your traits do you want to pass on to your child?
My level-headedness! And a rich inner life. Very important.

9) Which of your husband's traits do you want to pass on to your child?
Friendliness and enthusiasm!!

Now that we have two kids, I’m happy for them to split the pot. If at least one is friendly, I’ll be happy. If at least one is level-headed, I’ll be happy. Etc.

1 comment:

bubandpie said...

I remember this email. The thing that has stayed with me from it is the words "travelled lightly" - I've thought of them (and remembered the source) every time I've loaded up the trunk with diaper bag, booster chairs, etc.